Autism and Empathy

Last Updated on September 17, 2025 by John Hookway

A lot of people think autistic people do not feel empathy. This belief is not true.

“I often feel other people’s emotions so much that it is too much for me,” says one autistic adult.
New studies show that 78% of autistic people say they have hyper-empathy.

Empathy is different for each person. You may see that autism and empathy are linked in special ways. Knowing these differences helps you help and connect with autistic people.

Key Takeaways

• Autistic people can feel empathy. They might show it in different ways than neurotypical people. Many autistic people feel emotions very strongly. This is called hyper-empathy.
• The double empathy problem means both groups can misunderstand each other. Autistic people may have less cognitive empathy.
• But their emotional empathy can be very strong. Alexithymia is common in autistic people. It makes it hard to know and share feelings. Supportive places help autistic people connect and show empathy.
• Clear words and pictures help groups understand each other better. Doing group activities and daily check-ins helps people practice empathy. This can make relationships stronger.

Autism and empathy

Misconceptions

Some people think autistic people do not feel empathy. This is not true. Many believe this myth, but research says otherwise. Autistic people do feel empathy.

They might show it in ways that look different. People often misunderstand because communication styles are not the same.

Here is a table that shows a myth and the truth:

The issue is not that autistic people lack empathy. It is that empathy looks different for them. Some autistic people feel emotions very strongly.

Others may find it hard to show feelings in ways others get. These differences can confuse people and lead to wrong ideas.

• Many autistic people do feel empathy.
• How they show empathy is not always the same as neurotypical people.
• Misunderstandings happen because people communicate in different ways.

If people do not know about these differences, it can cause stigma. This makes it harder for autistic people to connect with others. You can help by learning the facts and telling others.

Research Overview

Scientists have studied autism and empathy for years. They found that empathy in autistic people is complex. It is different for each person.

Some autistic people have strong emotional empathy. This means they feel other people’s emotions deeply. Others may find it hard to know what someone else is thinking or feeling. This is called cognitive empathy.

• Empathy in autistic people is complex and varies a lot.
• Autistic people may have more emotional empathy than cognitive empathy.
• Some autistic people may not notice social cues but still feel emotions strongly.

Research shows about half of autistic people have alexithymia. This means they may not understand or describe their own feelings well. This can make it hard for them to show empathy in ways others expect.

Here are some study findings about empathy in autistic and neurotypical people:

Cognitive empathy is often lower in autistic people. Emotional empathy can be the same or even stronger. Autism and empathy are not opposites. They are connected in special ways.

Double Empathy Problem

The double empathy problem is a new idea. It says both autistic and non-autistic people can misunderstand each other. The issue is not just with autistic people. Both sides have trouble.

The double empathy problem shows that both autistic and allistic people can misunderstand each other. This happens because they communicate in different ways. People may think autistic people lack empathy, but it is really about how they talk and share feelings.

• The double empathy problem means both groups can misunderstand each other.
• Both autistic and non-autistic people have trouble reading social cues.
• Both sides should try to change how they communicate.

Autistic people often feel pressure to act like others. This can be tiring. Non-autistic people may think autistic people do not care. Without understanding, these problems can make life harder for autistic people.

Researchers found something called empathic disequilibrium. This means emotional empathy and cognitive empathy can be out of balance.

Some autistic people feel strong emotions but have trouble knowing what others think. This can cause stress and make social situations tough.

Learning about autism and empathy shows the real challenge is not about feeling. The challenge is how people understand and react to each other. Knowing this helps everyone feel understood.

Types of empathy

Empathy is not just one thing. There are different types of empathy. Each type helps you connect with others in special ways. Learning about these types shows how autism and empathy can be different for everyone.

Cognitive empathy

Cognitive empathy means you try to understand why someone feels or thinks a certain way. You look at things from their point of view. This helps you know what others might be going through, even if you do not feel the same.

Cognitive empathy is like stepping into someone else’s shoes to see what they think.

Researchers use tests like the Reading the Mind in the Eyes Test (RMET) to check cognitive empathy. Studies show autistic people often get lower scores on these tests than neurotypical people.

Sometimes, autistic people have trouble knowing what others are thinking. This does not mean they do not care. It just means they see social clues in a different way.

Here is a table that shows how cognitive and affective empathy scores compare:

Affective empathy

Affective empathy means you feel the same emotions as someone else. You share their feelings and understand their experience. For example, you might feel sad when your friend is sad, even if it is not your problem.

Affective empathy helps you connect by sharing feelings with others.

Research shows autistic people can have different patterns in affective empathy. Some may feel very upset when they see someone hurting.

Others may find it hard to show they care. This change from caring to feeling upset can make it harder for autistic people to show their feelings in ways others expect.

Here is a table that explains the differences:

Behavioral empathy

Behavioral empathy is what you do when you see someone needs help. You take steps to support them. This type of empathy turns feelings into actions.

Behavioral empathy means showing you care by what you do.

Autistic people may have a hard time showing behavioral empathy. They might not always notice how others feel, so it can be tough to know how to help.

Some autistic people want to help but are not sure what to do. Their actions may look different, but they still want to connect.

Here is a table that shows the main types of empathy:

When you learn about these types, you see that autism and empathy are not simple. Everyone can show empathy in their own way.

Empathy in autism

Strengths

Many autistic people have special strengths with empathy. Some feel emotions very deeply. They may react strongly to someone’s sadness or happiness.

This strong feeling can help them connect with others. Autistic people often care a lot about fairness and honesty. They might help friends who feel left out or sad. Their empathy stands out when someone needs comfort or understanding.

To support an autistic friend, listen to how they show care. You might find new ways to share empathy together.

Challenges

Empathy can look different for autistic people. Some have trouble understanding or showing feelings. People with more severe autism may not know what others feel.

They might not read faces or voices well. This does not mean they do not care. It means they need help to notice social clues.

Social communication

Social communication can make empathy harder for autistic people. They may show feelings in ways others do not expect.

For example, they might use fewer gestures or speak in a flat voice. Non-autistic people may not understand these signs. They might think autistic people do not feel empathy, but it just looks different.

Here is a table that shows common challenges:

The Double Empathy Problem means both groups can misunderstand each other. Autistic people may not guess how others feel.

Non-autistic people may not see how autistic people show feelings. These mix-ups can cause stigma and make friendships harder.

• The Double Empathy Problem means both sides can get confused.
• It can be hard to know what others feel or think.
• Others may not see your way of showing empathy.

Sensory factors

Sensory issues can also change how you feel empathy. Loud sounds, bright lights, or strong smells can be too much. These things can make it hard to focus on others’ feelings.

Sometimes, you need a break from people to calm down. This does not mean you do not care. You just need time to handle your own feelings first.

Expression differences

Autistic people may show empathy in ways that look different. Some show less empathy for happy feelings, but still care a lot when someone is sad.

You might notice they react more to sadness than to happiness. Cognitive empathy, or knowing what others think, can be lower. This does not mean they do not have empathy. It means their strengths and struggles are unique.

Here is a table that shows how empathy types compare:

Some autistic people show empathy by doing things, not just talking. They might help by fixing a problem or giving support. Their empathy may not look like what others expect, but it is real and important.

To understand autism and empathy, look at how autistic people show care. You might see empathy in what they do, what they say, or even in their quiet moments.

Alexithymia & interoception

Alexithymia

Alexithymia makes it hard to know and talk about your feelings. You might feel something but not know what it is. You may not have the words to explain it.

Many autistic people have alexithymia. This does not mean you do not feel things. It just means you cannot always say what you feel.

You can see how often alexithymia happens in different groups:

• Alexithymia is much more common in autistic people than others.
• Almost half of autistic females have alexithymia.
• About one out of five autistic males have it.
• Most neurotypical people do not have alexithymia.

Interoception

Interoception means you notice what is happening inside your body. You might feel your heart beat or know when you are hungry. For autistic people, this can be different. Some may not notice body signals much. Others may notice them a lot.

Studies show interoception is not the same for everyone with autism. Some autistic adults notice body signals less.

Others are very good at noticing them in some cases. Kids with autism may have different interoception skills than adults. These differences can change how you know your own feelings.

• Some autistic people do not notice body signals well.
• Others are very aware of their heartbeat or breathing.
• Interoception can also connect to feeling anxious.

Impact on empathy

Alexithymia and interoception both affect how you feel empathy. If you have alexithymia, you may not know the name for your feelings.

But you can still feel emotions very strongly. Many autistic people say they have strong empathy, even if it is hard to show. This means you can care about others even with alexithymia.

Interoception also changes empathy. When you notice your body signals, your brain links these to what you see in others.

Studies show that being aware of your body helps your brain react to other people’s feelings. This helps you understand and share feelings, even if you do not talk about them.

Alexithymia and interoception do not stop you from feeling empathy. They just change how you feel and show emotions. You may feel a lot inside, even if it is hard to explain.

Supporting empathy

Strategies

You can help autistic people show empathy by making everyone feel included. Make sure the space feels safe and welcoming for all.

When autistic people join group activities, they get more chances to learn about empathy. These chances help them practice caring about others. Autistic kids can get better at empathy when they are included.

• Plan group activities so everyone can take part.
• Set clear rules and routines so people know what will happen.
• Praise people when they show care or understanding.
• Give autistic people extra time to feel and respond.
• Use pictures or charts to explain feelings and social events.

When a space feels safe, autistic people can relax and connect with others.

Communication tips

Talking in a clear way helps people understand each other. This makes it easier to show empathy. You can use simple steps to help everyone talk and listen.

• Listen carefully and repeat what you hear to show you understand.
• Ask questions about feelings or things that happened. This shows you care.
• Try role-playing to practice how to act in different situations.
• Use pictures or stories to make talking easier and less confusing.
• Use calming tricks, like deep breaths, to help everyone feel relaxed.

You can learn to listen and ask questions. These skills help everyone feel important and heard.

Coping skills

Coping skills help autistic people deal with strong feelings about empathy. There are many ways to handle stress and big emotions.

Getting stronger at handling feelings makes it easier to deal with hard times. It also helps keep your body and mind calm.

Special tools, like changing how you think, can help you notice and understand feelings in yourself and others. These skills help you connect and show empathy every day.

Real-life perspectives

Stories

What do real-life experiences show about empathy in autism? Many autistic people say empathy is hard for everyone. It is not just a problem for one group.

The double empathy problem happens in daily life. Both autistic and neurotypical people can get confused by each other. One autistic adult says they tried for years to connect with neurotypical people.

They often feel lost because social rules are hard to understand. These struggles are not because they do not care. The problem comes from how people talk and understand each other.

Another story shows what happens when autistic people spend time together. One person says they feel a natural bond with other autistic people.

These moments feel easy and calm. It is not like the confusion that sometimes happens with neurotypical people. These stories show empathy is not missing. It just looks different based on who you are with and how you share feelings.

Social struggles often happen because both sides misunderstand each other. The double empathy problem explains why people may feel left out or confused. When you read these stories, you learn empathy goes both ways.

Quotes

What do autistic voices say about empathy and identity? Here are some quotes that help you understand:

• Temple Grandin: “Autism is not a disease, it’s a difference.”
• Kerry Magro: “Autism can’t define me. I define autism.”

These words show autism brings special ways of feeling and showing empathy. Autistic people want others to see who they are, not just how they act.

Lessons

What can you learn from these real-life perspectives? You can use many ways to support empathy in autistic people:

• Show empathy in your actions every day. Kids learn by watching you.
• Use daily check-ins to help kids think about their feelings and how they act.
• Try autism-friendly technology, like games or visual tools, to practice empathy.
• Encourage playdates and group activities. These give kids chances to practice empathy with others.
• Celebrate moments of empathy with praise. This helps kids feel good about themselves.

Teaching empathy helps autistic kids make strong friendships. You help them handle feelings and feel less worried. When you know what empathy looks like in autism, you can help everyone connect in a real way.

Resources

Books

There are many books that help you learn about empathy in autism. Some books use stories and pictures to teach about feelings. The Feelings Book by Todd Parr helps you learn about emotions. This is important for social skills. My Many Colored Days by Dr. Seuss uses colors to show feelings. This makes it easy to explore emotions. The Color Monster: A Pop-Up Book of Feelings by Anna Llenas lets you interact with the story. You can learn to name emotions with this book.

Books also show you what life is like for autistic people. The Reason I Jump by Naoki Higashida and Carly’s Voice by Carly Fleischmann share real stories. These books help you see the world through their eyes. You learn about sensory sensitivities and social challenges. Parents often feel less alone after reading about others’ experiences.

Books can help your family talk about feelings and build empathy together.

Support groups

Support groups are places where you can talk with others who understand autism and empathy. These groups help you share feelings, ask questions, and learn from others. Many parents feel comfort and understanding in these groups. You can also get tips for daily routines and ways to build emotional strength.

Here is a table that shows what support groups can offer:

• Support groups help you find guidance and encouragement.
• You can learn new ways to support your child or yourself.
• These groups help families become stronger.

Professional help

There are many types of professional help for empathy in autistic people. Early intervention programs give children a strong start. Therapists use different methods, like Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA), to teach social skills. Social skills training helps you practice understanding and sharing feelings. Mindfulness and emotional regulation teach you how to handle strong emotions.

• Early intervention helps young children build empathy skills.
• Therapy, like ABA, supports learning and communication.
• Social skills training gives you tools to connect with others.
• Mindfulness and emotional regulation help you handle big feelings.

Each person with autism is unique. Professionals can change their approach to fit your needs. This helps you grow your empathy in a way that works for you.

Professional support gives you and your family tools to understand and show empathy every day.

You have learned that empathy in autism is not simple. Studies show autistic people often feel big emotions. They care a lot, especially about people close to them.

• Empathy is not the same for all people.
• The double empathy problem means both groups can get confused.
• Knowing these differences helps stop wrong ideas.

You can help make a world where everyone feels important and included.

FAQ

What does empathy mean for autistic people?

Empathy can look different for autistic people. You might feel emotions very strongly. You may show feelings in ways others do not expect. You can care a lot, even if people do not notice.

What is the double empathy problem?

The double empathy problem means both groups can get confused. Autistic and non-autistic people may not understand each other. You might miss social clues, and others may not see your way of caring.

What challenges do autistic people face with empathy?

You may have trouble talking with others or get overwhelmed by sounds or lights. These things can make showing empathy hard. You still care about people, even if it is tough to show.

What is alexithymia, and how does it affect empathy?

Alexithymia makes it hard to know and talk about your feelings. You might feel something but not know how to say it. This can change how you show empathy to others.

What strategies help autistic people express empathy?

You can use simple words, pictures, and safe places. Practicing talking and using calming tools helps you connect. You can show empathy in your own way.

What resources support empathy in autism?

Books, support groups, and help from experts give you ways to learn about feelings. These resources help you understand and show empathy better.

What does research say about empathy in autism?

Studies say autistic people often feel emotions very deeply. You may get lower scores on some tests, but you can still care a lot about others.

What can families do to support empathy in autistic children?

Families can plan group games, praise caring actions, and check in every day. These steps help kids practice empathy and make friends.