Women With Autism: Exploring The Challenges

Many people think autism mostly affects boys. But new studies show many girls are not diagnosed until they are adults.

• People used to think the autism ratio was 4 boys to 1 girl. New research says it may be closer to 3 boys to 4 girls.
• Autistic women have a suicide risk thirteen times higher than women without autism.

You may have trouble with too much noise or light. Social pressure can be hard to handle. You might feel tired from hiding your true self.

Easy things like eating or shopping can feel too hard. These problems make you ask: why is your experience so different?

Key Takeaways

• Many women with autism are not diagnosed until they are adults. This happens because their symptoms are hard to notice. Society also has certain beliefs that make it harder to see these signs.
• Masking behaviors can make autistic women feel very tired. It can also make them lose their sense of who they are.
• Autistic women have more mental health problems than others. They often feel anxious and sad more than people without autism.
• Sensory sensitivities can make everyday tasks feel too hard. This can affect how they talk to people and how they feel overall.
• Many women with autism feel alone. They want friends but find it hard to connect with others.
• Getting healthcare and support that fits their needs is very important. It helps autistic women deal with their special challenges.
• Stigma and stereotypes can stop women with autism from speaking up for themselves. This makes it hard for them to get help and support.
• Teaching people about autism in women can help change wrong ideas. It can also help everyone understand autistic women better.

Diagnosis Barriers

Late or Missed Diagnosis

Self-Understanding

You may wonder why you did not get an autism diagnosis until later in life. Many girls and women with autism show signs that doctors and teachers often miss.

You might score lower on tests for autistic traits, even if you struggle every day. The way you act can look different from boys with autism.

You may hide your feelings or copy how others behave. This masking makes it hard for others to see your real challenges.

When you mask your social difficulties, you might feel confused about who you are. You may spend years trying to fit in, not knowing why things feel so hard. This can make it tough for you to understand yourself and your needs.

• The complex way autism shows up in women often leads to misdiagnosis.
• You may internalize your problems, which hides your struggles from others.
• Many women with autism need better tools for diagnosis that match their experiences.

Delayed Support

If you do not get a diagnosis early, you may miss out on help and support. You might get labeled with other mental health issues, like anxiety or depression, instead of autism.

This can delay the right treatment and make daily life harder. You may feel alone or misunderstood.

• Women with autism often receive diagnoses for other mental disorders first.
• The lack of gender-specific diagnostic tools makes it harder for you to get the right help.
• You may wait years before someone recognizes your autism, which can affect your confidence and wellbeing.

Gender Bias

Stereotypes

You face stereotypes that say autism mostly affects boys. Many people think girls cannot have autism, or they believe girls show the same signs as boys. This bias comes from old research that focused on males.

• Most studies about autism looked at boys, so doctors may not notice autism in girls.
• People often overlook the subtle signs of autism in girls, leading to fewer diagnoses.
• The way experts define autism has changed over time, but male-centered ideas still shape how people see it.

Symptom Overlap

You may have symptoms that overlap with other conditions. For example, you might have anxiety, depression, or trouble with eating.

Doctors may focus on these problems and miss your autism. You may feel frustrated when your real needs go unnoticed.

• Girls and boys show similar rates of concerns for autism, but girls get diagnosed less often.
• Subtle symptoms in girls often get missed, so you may not get the support you need.
• You might receive help for other issues, but not for autism itself.

If you think you might have autism, keep track of your feelings and behaviors. Share them with your doctor. This can help you get the right diagnosis and support.

Social Challenges

Masking Behaviors

You may feel pressure to hide your true self in social situations. Many women with autism use masking to fit in with others.

You might copy how people talk, make eye contact, or rehearse what you want to say before meeting someone.

Studies show that camouflage behavior happens more often in autistic females than in males. You may feel a stronger need to follow social rules and appear “normal.”

Women are often expected to inhabit social roles that require well-developed social dexterity and emotional intelligence, leading to greater pressure to mask their autistic traits.

Emotional Toll

Masking can drain your energy. You may feel tired after social events because you spend so much effort pretending.

This stress can lead to anxiety or depression. You might worry that people will not accept you if they see your real self. Over time, this can make you feel sad or alone.

• You may mask to avoid judgment or bullying.
• Masking can make you feel disconnected from your emotions.
• You might struggle to relax, even when you are alone.

Identity Strain

When you mask every day, you may lose sight of who you are. You might wonder if people like you for your true self or just the version you show them.

This confusion can make it hard to build confidence. You may feel stuck between wanting to fit in and wanting to be yourself.

• You may change your behavior to match others.
• You might feel unsure about your likes and dislikes.
• You may find it hard to express your needs.

Isolation

You may feel lonely, even when you are around people. Many women with autism want friends but struggle to connect.

You might notice a gap between the relationships you want and the ones you have. Some studies show that autistic women often feel isolated inside themselves, not just from others.

• Participants in a study by Elmose (2020) said, “when you are lonely, then it is because you are not able to do anything about it yourself.”
• Hickey et al. (2018) found that some women long for connection but still feel totally isolated.
• Research by Ee et al. (2019) suggests that being female can affect feelings of loneliness among autistic adults.

Friendships

Making and keeping friends can be hard. You may not know how to start conversations or keep them going. You might worry about saying the wrong thing. Sometimes, you may feel left out or misunderstood by your peers.

• You may want close friends but find it hard to trust others.
• You might lose friends because of misunderstandings.
• You may feel safer alone, even if you wish for company.

Misunderstanding

People may not understand your needs or feelings. You might act differently in social settings, which can confuse others.

Some may think you do not want to join in, but you may just feel overwhelmed. This misunderstanding can make you feel even more alone.

• You may struggle to explain your feelings.
• Others might misread your actions.
• You may feel judged for things you cannot control.

Women With Autism often face these social challenges every day. You may feel pressure to mask, struggle with loneliness, and wish for deeper connections. These experiences can shape how you see yourself and others.

Mental Health Risks

Many women with autism deal with mental health problems every day. You might feel more anxious or sad than your friends.

These feelings can last longer and feel stronger. Your struggles may be harder than what most people go through.

Anxiety and Depression

You may feel worried or sad more often than others. These feelings can change your mood and energy. They can make it hard to enjoy things. If you have autism, you are more likely to feel depressed or anxious than people without autism.

Triggers

Many things can make you feel anxious or sad. Social events, loud sounds, or changes in plans may stress you out.

You might worry about fitting in or being misunderstood. Sometimes, you feel sad because you cannot connect with others the way you want.

• Autistic people are up to four times more likely to feel depressed than others.
• About 20.2% of autistic teens have depression, while other teens have rates between 8.4% and 15.4%.
• Studies show autistic youth have more depression than their peers.

These feelings may not go away quickly. They can become part of your daily life.

Treatment Barriers

Getting help for mental health can be tough. You may face problems that make it hard to find support. Many women with autism say doctors and therapists do not always understand them.

You may feel upset when you cannot get the help you need. Sometimes, you might not ask for help because you worry about being misunderstood or judged.

Co-Occurring Conditions

You may have other mental health or developmental problems along with autism. These are called co-occurring conditions. They can make life even harder.

• Anxiety disorders
• Depression
• Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD)
• Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)
• Bipolar Disorder
• Eating disorders
• Substance Use Disorder
• Schizophrenia

Eating Disorders

You might have trouble with eating disorders, like anorexia or bulimia. These problems can hurt your health and self-esteem.

Research shows eating disorders are linked to suicide risk. People with eating disorders, especially bulimia nervosa, have a much higher risk of suicide than those without these problems.

Bipolar Disorder

Some women with autism also have bipolar disorder. This causes big mood swings, from feeling very happy to very sad. Studies show bipolar disorder often happens with autism and can raise the risk of suicidal thoughts and actions.

Suicidal Ideation

You may think about hurting yourself or ending your life. Teens with high-functioning autism have a higher risk for these thoughts and actions.

Having autism, bipolar disorder, and eating disorders can make this risk even greater. If you ever feel this way, you are not alone. Many people with autism feel this way, and asking for help is important.

If you have mental health problems, you deserve help and kindness. You can talk to a trusted adult, counselor, or doctor. Help is out there, and your feelings matter.

Women With Autism often face these mental health risks more than others. You may deal with anxiety, depression, and other problems that make life harder. Getting the right help can make things better and improve your wellbeing.

Sensory and Sleep Issues

Sensory Overload

Daily Discomfort

You might notice your senses feel stronger than other people’s. Everyday things like lights, sounds, and smells can bother you.

Many autistic women say they are very sensitive to bright lights, loud noises, or certain textures. These feelings can make simple things, like going to school or work, feel tiring.

Common sensory sensitivities include:

• Sights (bright lights, flashing screens)
• Sounds (loud music, sudden noises)
• Smells (perfume, cleaning products)
• Tastes (strong flavors, certain foods)
• Touch (tags in clothing, certain fabrics)
• Balance (feeling dizzy or off-balance)
• Awareness of body position and movement
• Awareness of internal body cues (hunger, pain)

These sensitivities often do not go away as you get older. Many women with autism also feel pain or temperature changes more than others. This can make daily life feel uncomfortable and tiring.

Sensory overload can use up your energy and make it hard to pay attention. You may feel tired or even sick after being in busy places.

Social Pressures

Social events can be extra hard for you. You might feel like you have to join group activities, but loud or crowded places can be too much.

Many autistic women say they stay away from public places because they feel overwhelmed. This can mean you have fewer chances to meet people or join in.

• You might skip parties or gatherings to avoid loud sounds or strong smells.
• Feeling overwhelmed can make you want to leave early or not go at all.
• Some people may not understand why you need quiet or calm spaces.

If you avoid social situations, you may feel left out or lonely. This can make it harder to make friends and feel close to others.

Sleep Disturbances

Sensory Triggers

It can be hard to sleep if your senses stay active at night. Small noises, changes in light, or the feeling of your sheets can keep you awake. Many women with autism have trouble falling asleep or staying asleep because of these things.

You can see that sleep problems are more common in people with autism than in those without it.

Impact on Wellbeing

Not sleeping well can change your mood, energy, and health. You may feel more worried or grumpy when you do not sleep enough.

Trouble sleeping can make it harder to deal with sensory overload during the day. This can create a cycle where both problems make each other worse.

• You may feel tired at school or work.
• Not sleeping enough can make sensory problems worse.
• Good sleep can help you feel calmer and more focused.

Try making a calm bedtime routine and use soft lights or quiet sounds to help you sleep better.

Sensory and sleep issues can affect your daily life in many ways. Knowing what you need and finding ways to help yourself can make you feel more comfortable and supported.

Safety and Vulnerability

Abuse Risks

Sexual Victimization

You are more likely to face abuse than other women. Studies show autistic women have more sexual victimization than most women. This risk can hurt your safety and mental health every day.

• Autistic women say they have higher rates of sexual victimization.
• A Swedish study found autistic women had almost three times the rate of coercive sexual victimization.
• College students with autism were twice as likely to report unwanted sexual contact than students without autism.
• Research showed high victimization rates, with 68.9% of autistic women reporting victimization through open questions and 88.4% through standardized questionnaires.
• Autistic women said they had higher rates of all types of violence than non-autistic women.

You may feel unsafe in places where others feel fine. People might use your trust or trouble reading social cues against you. This can make you more open to abuse.

Many autistic women say they do not always notice when someone wants to hurt them. You might miss warning signs or feel unsure about what is happening.

Recognizing Danger

You may find it hard to spot danger in social situations. Reading body language or hidden intentions can be tough. Sometimes, you trust people who do not care about your safety. This can put you at risk for harm or trickery.

• You might not see when someone crosses your boundaries.
• You may feel confused about what is safe or unsafe.
• People may use your honesty or kindness against you.

Learning about safe boundaries and practicing saying “no” can help protect you. You deserve to feel safe and respected.

Reporting Barriers

Communication Issues

Telling someone about abuse can feel very hard. You might struggle to find the right words or explain what happened. Some autistic people have trouble describing their feelings or experiences. This can make it hard for you to report abuse or ask for help.

• You may feel overwhelmed when talking about painful events.
• You might worry that others will not understand you.
• Sometimes, you cannot remember details or put them into words.

If you have trouble speaking up, you are not alone. Many autistic women face the same challenge.

Fear of Disbelief

You may worry that people will not believe you if you report abuse. Some adults or professionals might ignore your story or think you misunderstood. This fear can stop you from asking for help.

• You might feel scared to tell someone what happened.
• You may worry about being blamed or judged.
• Some people may not take your concerns seriously.

You have the right to be heard and supported. If you feel unsafe, try to reach out to someone you trust. Your safety and feelings matter.

Daily Living

Work and Family

Gendered Expectations

You may notice that people expect you to act a certain way at work or home because you are a woman. These expectations can feel heavy.

Many autistic women try to hide their true selves to fit in. You might copy how others act or speak, hoping to avoid standing out. This camouflaging can leave you feeling tired and alone.

• You may feel pressure to act “normal” at work or with family.
• You might spend extra energy trying to read social cues or follow unspoken rules.
• Sensory sensitivities can make busy offices or family gatherings hard to handle.
• Social interaction can feel confusing, especially when you need to guess what others want or mean.

Trying to meet these expectations can lead to emotional exhaustion. You may feel like you never get to relax or be yourself.

Independence

Finding your own path matters. You need a job and a home life that match your strengths and needs. Many autistic women do best when their work fits their interests and skills. Supportive workplaces help you thrive. You may need clear rules, quiet spaces, or flexible hours.

• Jobs that match your skills help you stay happy and healthy.
• Supportive policies at work can make a big difference.
• You may need help with daily tasks at home, like planning meals or keeping a schedule.

You deserve a life where you feel safe and valued. The right environment can help you grow and succeed.

Sensory in Public

Clothing and Appearance

You might find some clothes uncomfortable. Tags, seams, or certain fabrics can bother your skin. Picking outfits for work or social events can feel stressful. You may worry about looking “right” while also needing comfort.

• Soft fabrics and loose clothing can help you feel better.
• You may avoid certain styles or shoes because they hurt or distract you.
• Some people may not understand why you dress differently.

Choose clothes that make you feel calm and confident. Comfort is important for your wellbeing.

Overstimulation

Public places can feel overwhelming. Bright lights, loud sounds, and strong smells can make you want to leave.

You may feel anxious in crowded stores, busy streets, or noisy offices. Sensory overload can make it hard to focus or enjoy yourself.

• Sensory rooms in public spaces can help you calm down and feel safe.
• These spaces let you take a break from noise and crowds.
• Staff training and thoughtful design make sensory rooms more helpful for you.

When you have access to quiet spaces, you can join in more activities and feel more independent. This support helps you take part in work, family, and community life.

Health Inequities

Physical Health

Common Conditions

You may notice that your physical health needs differ from those of others. Women with autism often face higher risks for certain health problems.

Doctors have found that you are more likely to have blood disorders and issues with your hormones or metabolism. These problems can affect your daily life and make you feel unwell more often than your peers.

Here is a table showing how common some health conditions are for autistic women compared to autistic men:

You can see that women with autism have higher odds of these conditions than men with autism. You may need to visit doctors more often or take extra steps to manage your health.

Life Expectancy

Life expectancy also shows a gap. On average, women with autism do not live as long as women in the general population. This difference can feel unfair and may come from health problems, lack of support, or stress.

You can see that women with autism live about 6 to 13 years less than other women. This gap highlights the need for better health care and support.

Access to Care

Service Gaps

You may find it hard to get the health care you need. Many women with autism report these common barriers:

• Doctors may not have enough training about autism.
• You may need providers who understand severe autism symptoms.
• Communication with doctors can be difficult.
• Sensory challenges in clinics can make visits stressful.
• The healthcare system can feel confusing and hard to use.
• Stigma about autism can stop you from getting help.
• Waiting rooms and long waits may cause anxiety or sensory overload.

Some groups face even more challenges. For example, Black single female caregivers of children with autism often struggle to find services. They face barriers based on race, gender, and social class. These gaps show that not everyone gets the same care.

Representation

You may feel that doctors and researchers do not always listen to your needs. Most studies focus on white, married families.

This leaves out the voices of women from different backgrounds. When your experiences are not included, it becomes harder to get the right support.

You deserve health care that fits your needs. Better training for doctors, more research on women with autism, and fair access to services can help close these gaps. Your health and wellbeing matter.

Support Barriers for Women With Autism

Tailored Services

You need help that matches your life and needs. Many programs do not focus on what helps you best. Some services try to help, but they often miss what autistic women need.

Most support centers and therapies use the same plan for everyone. This can make you feel left out or not understood.

Healthcare Gaps

Doctors and clinics may not give care that fits your needs. Many health workers do not know much about autism in women.

You might have trouble finding a doctor who listens or understands your symptoms. Some clinics do not have quiet rooms or staff who know about sensory issues. You may feel nervous or uncomfortable during visits.

Types of tailored support services you might find:

• Special therapies that focus on your strengths and challenges
• Social skills training to help you connect with others
• Sensory integration techniques for comfort in daily life
• Mental health support for anxiety and depression

You may also see therapy and counseling, support groups for women, occupational therapy for daily tasks, and cognitive-behavioral therapy for emotional health.

Some places offer help with diagnosis, job training, and social groups for making friends. These services can help, but you may find they are hard to get or not made for your needs.

Social Services

Social services often do not meet the needs of autistic women. You may feel left out in research and programs.

Many studies focus on men, so your experiences do not get enough attention. You might wait longer for a diagnosis, which can cause problems at school and work. Late diagnosis can make you more open to bullying and abuse.

Common gaps in social services:

• Few programs focus on women’s experiences
• Not enough inclusion in research studies
• Lack of support for academic and social challenges
• Limited help for those who face bullying or abuse

You deserve services that understand your life and help you do well.

Stigma

Stigma can make it hard for you to get help or speak up for yourself. People may believe wrong ideas about autism, which can hurt your confidence and stop you from asking for support.

Stereotypes

You may hear labels like “weird,” “loner,” or “violent.” These words do not show who you are. Stereotypes make it harder for you to feel accepted.

The mix of sexism and autism stigma can lead to unfair treatment and harm. You might feel pressure to hide your true self to avoid judgment.

Social pressures can make you hide your traits. This can hurt your mental health and make it harder to ask for help.

Self-Advocacy

You have the right to speak up for your needs. Stigma and stereotypes can make this tough. You may feel nervous about sharing your story or asking for help.

Some people may not believe you or may ignore your voice. This can stop you from getting the support you need.

Ways stigma affects self-advocacy:

• You may feel less confident to ask for help
• You might avoid sharing your story
• Social pressures can make you hide your needs

You can build self-advocacy skills by joining support groups, learning about your rights, and meeting others who understand your journey. More representation in research and services can help you feel seen and heard.

You deserve respect, understanding, and support. When you speak up, you help others learn and grow. Your voice matters.

You deal with problems every day that are not the same as those faced by autistic men or neurotypical women.

Many people do not understand what you need because there are many myths and your symptoms can be hard to see.

You can make a difference by joining groups that speak up for autistic women, telling your story, and helping with research.

• Teach people in your area about autism in women
• Ask for more studies that look at women’s health
• Help others who have the same kinds of problems

Every person’s voice is important. By working together, you can help make the world kinder and more fair for autistic women.

FAQ

What are some signs of autism in women?

You may notice you feel overwhelmed by noise or lights. You might copy others to fit in. You could struggle with friendships or feel tired after social events. Many women hide their struggles, so signs can look different from those in men.

Why do many women get diagnosed late?

Doctors often look for signs seen in boys. You may mask your traits, making them harder to spot. Many tests do not match your experiences. This can lead to missed or late diagnoses.

How can you manage sensory overload?

You can use noise-canceling headphones, sunglasses, or soft clothing. Take breaks in quiet spaces. Create a calm routine at home. Let people know what helps you feel comfortable.

Are mental health problems common for autistic women?

Yes. You may face anxiety, depression, or eating disorders more often than others. These problems can feel stronger and last longer. Getting support from a counselor or doctor can help.

What should you do if you feel unsafe?

Trust your feelings. Leave the situation if you can. Tell someone you trust. You deserve to feel safe. Practice saying “no” and learn about safe boundaries.

How can you find support?

Look for local autism groups or online communities. Ask your doctor about services for women with autism. Support groups, therapy, and social skills classes can help you connect and feel understood.

Can you succeed at work or school?

Yes! You can do well when you have support and understanding. Ask for clear instructions, quiet spaces, or flexible schedules. Focus on your strengths and interests.

How can you help others understand your needs?

Share information about autism in women. Use simple words to explain what helps you. You can write down your needs or use pictures. Teaching others helps them support you better.